Sunday, May 19, 2019

Love Cycle Essay

The rain starts pouring that item early purgeing. Other students run towards buildings for shelter, tho I do not notice the cold. How I expression is much everywherepowering than the disgust I would have felt for me getting soaked at whatsoever other fourth dimension. My feet automatically stop right undermenti angiotensin-converting enzymed to the bench where I have first seen her. That was what, more than a year ago, and I have not seen her for six months now. My beautiful, lovable Angie.Nothing could have ready me for that one, fateful night when I passed by the very(prenominal) spot on my way home and, against the tail of the park, I noticed a little lady friend with her head bowed, her arms propped against the bench, and her hair covering her face. It was fall then, too, and that hopeless figure got me worried in spite of myself. So I had approached where she sat, and carefully asked, Uhm, miss? She did not reckon up. Maybe she was a stone sculpture, until I he ard a hiccup. Miss, are you OK? Its raining and, uh, its kind of shadower here. The girl slowly sat upright until she was savouring at me directly.I swear I heard angels singing when she trained those eyes on me. But they were sad, tear-stained eyes. I could not help thinking what possibly made such beautiful girl cry. Yes, she was beautiful even with the dark stains in her cheeks. Despite the situation, the guy in me just could not stop checking her let on. She looked tall and slender. Her hair was long, more or less reaching her elbow. She had these thin eyebrows, the kind I usually looked at in women. They made her eyes look bigger and God, didnt she have the longest eyelashes. What guy wouldnt fall for a woman who looks a same(p) her?My scrutiny halted when she muttered, almost inaudibly, Im OK. Her voice sounded sweet to my ears. I have never been a picky person, except when it mothers to women. I advise eat anything, anyone do-nothing be my friend, and I skunk neve r just pick come in one woman from the crowd and pursue her til she say that sweet Yes. I come close maybe thats the reason why I fell hopelessly in love with Angie. She just appeared into my life with off warning, and she never sent any signal to my direction that she likes me, too. A hebdomad after that incident, I was forced to do some researching at the main library.By any choice, I would have chosen to play hoops with the guys, but my grade was on the line. Little did I jazz that Id see her for the second time, in the library. The funny thing was we were obviously looking for the same thing because we reached for an old book at the same time. When we looked at each other, I shew out it was her. She must have recognized me because she tentatively smiled. Uh, go ahead, I said, ever the gentleman. She took the book and said, I guess theres only this copy here. By the way, Im Angie. You were that guy. It made me smile because she did remember. yeaIm Skip. When she looked puzz led, I added, Actually its Steven, but Im usually called Skip. It was a year ago now, but I can still remember the way she smiled when we studied that book, or the way her face lit up whenever she talked. Eventually we became friends as we found out we had the same instructor but a different schedule on a subject. That friendship entitled me to see her effortless and talk with her. As days and months passed, I became more attached to Angie. Sometimes I would decline my compeer invitation for one basketball game just so I could accompany Angie to wherever she wanted to go.I found out that I immensely enjoyed her company because we have so many things in common. We both(prenominal) grew up in a broken family she lived with her father, while I grew up with my mother. The comfort we found in each other after talking about a similar experience drew us ever closer. It dawned on me one day that I have fallen in love with Angie. either time shes away, it creates a hollow feeling that only she can fill. Even my friends noticed the diversify in me. I was too afraid to let her know. The last time I pursued a girl, she turned me down even before I could ask her.I felt that it might knock the second time around with Angie. That would surely crush my heart, or any chances of her and me ending up together. much days passed. I got the shock of my life when one night, while I was at the apartment study with my friends, she came barging into the room wearing the biggest, most beautiful smile. I was imagining her notifying me, Skip, I just found out that I could not live without you Instead, she told me and everyone else, Skip My goodness, you wouldnt believe this Will finally asked me I frowned upon interview that name.I only met Will once or twice, and it didnt dawn on me that he was persist my Angie, too. I didnt even know if the two dated. After Angie told me about him, I felt like the world was crushing me. Would she have worn the same, big, beautiful smile if I asked her? Probably not. I died when she next announced, Skip, he asked me. How could I not say yes? We dated a few times but we of all time see each other during Math II and I no longer heard the ministration of it because I stood up and, without saying anything, locked myself in my room. I didnt hear her knocking, nor her voice pleading me to come out and tell her whats wrong.The erratic beating of my barely functioning heart was too vocal for me to hear anything. What Angie said, it was like a dagger. After all this time, Ive been building my courage to finally tell her how I feel. But she beat me to it, with a very cruel message. Anger, regret, and resentment rolled up until I couldnt take it anymore. I wanted to shout, to hurt myself. But how could I rewind the time, back to the days when I was on the verge of professing to her? I never felt so bad in my life, not even the way I feel about my last unfortunate episode with a girl can compare.I have loved Angie, so much in fact that I can give up anything. I nurtured this feeling until it blossomed into full-blown love that is far from what any man can comprehend. I wanted her back. I wanted back my Angie. It was so unfair. I know I havent indicated that I feel something special for her, but how could she not notice? It was like telling me, in my face, that she doesnt think Im good enough for her. It was too much that I found myself crying into the night like I never did before. The tears just wouldnt stop even if I reminded myself it was not a macho thing.But who cares? The woman Ive secretly loved for so long, just fluttered away. I found out it was hard. Since that night I avoided her, ignored her calls, her messages. I was hurting so much that I didnt want to see her. Eventually the calls and messages stopped. I barely saw her in the months that followed. If I did, she was in the company of that guy who could have been me had I dared to tell her. I tried to move on because I can see that shes ha ppy. I was just unsure if it would be a great idea right now to be friends with her again.So the days and months that followed, I immersed myself into studying, hanging out with my friends and signing up for other activities to help me forget. I knew there was no other way but to forget, and forget I did. So in that early evening, I sit where she sat more than one year ago. The rain was accommodating, falling endlessly and washing the tears from my eyes. I was not crying because of regret, but because of the fact that I really did move on after all. I prop my hands over the edge of the cold bench and watch as droplets of rain create ripples in the puddle of water supply on my feet.Suddenly, rain stops falling in the puddle but it does not stop entirely. A pair of shoes appeared just next to the bench, and I noticed that a shadow stretches over the lawn in front of me. A female voice carefully asked, Excuse me. Are you alright? Yeah, its time for me to let go. Time can heal all wou nds, and rain can wash away tears. I couldnt help smiling at the turn of two similar events one more than a year ago, and the other, right now. With a smile I looked up into the worried face of a girl holding an umbrella towards me and I said, Yes, Im OK.

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